The Release Podcast

What The Divorce Mediator Is Really Thinking, With Superstar Mediator Joe Dillon

What would possess a person to choose to put themselves in the middle of the maelstrom of stress that is modern divorce negotiation, on a daily basis?
For Joe Dillon, the founder of Equitable Divorce Mediation, it was personal. A child of divorce at a time when it was far less common than it is today, Joe can recall sitting in the courtroom as a teen, witnessing his parent’s strife at close range, and then withstanding the near total loss of any relationship with one parent after the fact. Years later, amidst a successful business career as a negotiator, it was in fact his mother-in-law who suggested he consider a new path. And it stuck.The firm which he founded and runs to this day with his wife 17 years later, far outperforms the industry standards metrics on settling via mediation before costly litigation. The impact of prolonged litigation is deeply clear to Joe, which is why his goal is always to get it done as soon as possible, and in the best interests of the kids.
The problem, unfortunately, is usually just teaching the soon-to-be-ex-spouses how to get out of their own way….
 
Joe is a former board member of the Chicago chapter of the Association for Conflict Resolution (ACR), the Pennsylvania Council of Mediators, the Southern California Mediation Association (SCMA), the Academy of Professional Family Mediators, the NY State Council on Divorce Mediation, and the Washington Mediation Association. And he’s got some hard won advice that anybody even contemplating divorce should consider.

How We Can Teach Our Kids To Really Trust Themselves, with Dr. Christine Cocchiola, Coercive Control Expert

They say that divorce is an earthquake for the people leaving a marriage, but a chronic condition for the children who have to survive it…but in truth that’s only if at least one parent refuses to fix their mindset and prioritize the children. Sadly, for many healthy folks, their coparents can’t keep their side of the street clean. From mockery to outright mental and physical abuse, what they inflicted on you while married will likely be visited upon the children during their time with that parent as well, and that’s a painful surprise for many.
 
So what can a protective parent do? 

Well, for one, listen to this week’s podccast with Dr. Christine Cocchiola, whose specialty is Coercive Control (also the topic of her viral TED talk) in relationships, post-separation abuse, the weaponization of the family court system by abusive parents, and most importantly…the best strategies for protecting our kids. More people than ever are opting out now of abusive marriages, and awakening to the tactics being used to punish them and their children, often for years after the leave. Dr. Cocchiola knows all too well after 3 decades as a domestic violence counselor and a survivor of a 27 year toxic relationship & marriage as well, that there is hope. If you can get into the right mindset, and get clear on the coercive control as a consistent pattern in the abuser’s playbook…there is always always hope.

What Does It Take To Keep Coparenting…About The Kids? With Michelle Dempsey

Divorce may be an earthquake….but high-conflict coparenting can feel like a marathon (without water through a jungle that is sometimes on fire), not a sprint. And few people are working as hard to refocus coparenting on the children, than Michelle Dempsey. Michelle Dempsey is a trauma-informed co-parenting expert helping to protect our kids in divorce, by centering their experience. She's also the founder of the Moving On Method and the author of Moving On. After a childhood where she experienced a very high conflict and drawn out divorce between her own parents, she grew up, got married, and realized she needed a divorce herself. Now happily remarried and co-parenting her own daughter while step-parenting her bonus daughter, Michelle has lots of hard-earned wisdom to share. On this week's podcast, we are talking about what it takes to set the right tone, how you can message positively about hard things without gaslighting your own children, why labels like narcissist don't often serve us, and how hard it is to get it right. Michelle has some ideas. And from where I sit, she's definitely one of those who is in fact getting it right.

Does Reaching The Summit Really Matter More Than Anything? With Sam Sidiqi, The Founder of Afghan Peaks & First Afghan to Summit Both Everest and Denali

Have you ever considered how satisfying it would be to climb one, two, or even seven of the tallest peaks on Earth? Sam Sidiqi has, and he has the distinction of being the very first Afghan in the world to summit both Mount Everest and Mount Denali. On today's podcast, we're talking about what it is that drives somebody to put themselves through pre-acclimatization, oxygen deprivation, months of training and up to two months away from their family to cross that item off their bucket list. Sam was born in Afghanistan, raised in Pennsylvania, went to MIT and Wharton and ran companies around the world before coming back to settle in Pennsylvania where he has spent the last couple of years, summitting very high peaks, launching his nonprofit called Afghan Peaks and helping his daughter Jasmine to understand why daddy feels this deep need for adventure. This week we're talking about how you translate that need to yourself, to your family, and to your daughter. For more on Sam & Afghan Peaks: https://afghanpeaks.org/BASC/index.html @afghanpeaks

The Net Worth To Self Worth Connection, With Nancy Griffin

What is at the root of the shift in giving? Beyond Melinda Gates and Mackenzie Scott, the numbers of women in philanthropy are soaring. And it might not be for the reasons you think.
 
Nancy Griffin has learned a few things about the ways of women's minds...when they set their minds to giving. Her company, Women Worth & Wellness (and the related seminar series) grew out of a career as a wealth advisor where she was led after a successful early stint at Proctor & Gamble, when women weren't exactly commonplace in the boardroom.She's developed an eye for how women navigate the connection between net worth and self worth, and the line between giving and impacting. 

Finally Ready To Be Seen, With Alexandria Ott

Why does it take most of us most of our lives to figure out that the hiding and shrinking was the opposite of the point? That we are here to love whomever we were created to be, guts and insecurities and all? 
 
Alexandria Ott is swimming through that realization, and is very ready to share her journey, almost in real time. Alexandria cofounded The Blank Table underground dinner series, speaks widely about the power of authenticity both during keynotes and on her podcast, and was also founder of Chrome City Creative Studio, a trailblazing, all-women team specializing in unforgettable experiences for brands in hospitality, design, and the arts.
Today we’re deep-diving into what she learned about truth, healing, the importance of tenderness…when life forced her to crack her own world wide open. And she’s so much better off for it. From where I’m sitting...all I can say is SAME.

Using The Patriarchy Against Itself, With Neeki Motabar

Neeki Motabar is an outspoken feminist influencer and the host of The Baddest B--- in the building, who in her own words is teaching women how to hack the patriarchy.
 
Whether she's deconstructing double standards, sharing a feminine twist on The 48 Laws Of Power, or setting records as a weightlifter...we love that message for her. And we love that she does it all in pink. Because she’s the kind of girl she wants to be, and she just wants every other girlie in the world to also make the space to define that for herself, and then go do it. She is misunderstood, she knows who she is and who she does not want to be, she pisses a lot of people off, and she’s really overall quite unbothered by it all.
 
What a wonderful way to walk through life.
 
For more on Neeki Motabar, and her upcoming book: https://www.instagram.com/baddestbinthebldg/

Escape From The Manosphere, With James Bloodworth, Author of LOST BOYS

What kind of personality type is most susceptible to being lured into the darkest parts of the Manosphere? Why is it that some young men can browse the same content without choosing to dive ever deeper? Do the men who follow influencers spouts seriously misogynistic ideas…even understand that somewhere deep inside, they sort of hate women? James Bloodworth has thoughts on all of this and more. Having gone undercover inside the manosphere as research for his book, Lost Boys, Bloodworth took a journey not of lot of others who are willing to talk about it, have. Bloodworth’s skepticism gave him a different take on how we got here, how bad it has gotten, and where it is we are all going.

How Important Is Redemption? With TRY AGAIN Author Nick Marshall

Ever wondered what became of your high school drug dealer? Nick Marshall has the answer at least in his own story, which begins in small town New Jersey, lands him in prison, and has led him to his latest book, TRY AGAIN.
 
It all began with a bullied kid, doing a simple favor for a coworker at a gas station. Then it evolved into selling weed and graduating into club drugs like Special K while living the high life in NYC’s clubbing heyday. And then it crashed hard with an armed robbery of a fellow drug dealer that earned Nick three years in prison, all before the age of 25. And that was just the beginning of his wake-up call. In some ways his story of finding maturity is universal, and in other ways nothing like what you’ve heard before. Nowadays Nick is an author and director with his latest book TRY AGAIN out wherever you get yours.
 
This week on the podcast we are talking about redemption, the dumb choices we make when we’re young, the stubbornness that keeps us on a path we know even then is not the right one….and how sweet it feels to one day be able to say that you’ve clawed your way back up into a life you can actually be proud of.
 
For Nick's Book Visit: https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Try-Again/Nick-Marshall/9781632280985

Are We Better Off Without God? With Sociology Professor Phil Zuckerman

What is the purpose, in the modern world, of the idea of God? And would we better off without religion?
 
My guest today is Phil Zuckerman, a sociologist, professor, and lifelong student of the nature and purpose or Religion. Currently a professor of sociology and secular studies at Pitzer College he is the founder of the first Secular Studies department in the nation; this entails the study of non-religious people, groups, thought, and cultural expressions. He has written several books, including What It Means to be Moral, Living the Secular Life, and Society Without God. You can find his work regularly in both Huffington Post and Psychology Today, where he blogs regularly under the title “The Secular Life.”